| You pull the collar of your flannel shirt about your neck | | | | you stumble upon a more enticing way to spend your |
| to ward off the chill. Refilling your coffee cup, more out | | | | day it's simply an added bonus. |
| of boredom than real need, you shuffle to the window | | | | 3. Be Definitive With Times. Don't fall into the |
| and take in the wintry scene. The leaves have by now | | | | temptation of being careless at this stage of your |
| abandoned their trees, the grass has browned and | | | | planning. Be specific, even if that is not your normal |
| even the pavement seems harsher than just last | | | | bent, in each of the activities you plan for the day. |
| week. The barrenness unsettles you, reminding you of | | | | Most of all, plan stingily. Allot time periods to activities |
| the barrenness you feel within. "Well," you whisper, | | | | that are on the shy side of what you actually expect |
| "Happy Thanksgiving." | | | | they may require. If the stroll by the lake usually takes |
| Holidays are certainly meant to be joyous times of | | | | an hour, figure it for forty-five minutes. The |
| celebration. Family and friends unite, sharing both food | | | | two-and-a-half hour afternoon matinee? Two hours |
| and folly, as they renew relationships stretched thin by | | | | tops. The purpose in scheduling in this manner is to |
| the passage of time. But, for many Americans, | | | | give yourself the opportunity to feel satisfied at the |
| holidays are stark reminders of personal pain - gift | | | | end of the day - which, like the other portions of the |
| wrapped appropriately for the present torturous | | | | day, should be both thoughtfully planned and well |
| season. Failed relationships, loneliness, physical or | | | | defined. By planning in this abbreviated fashion you will |
| mental disabilities, and more serve to heighten the | | | | not find yourself lingering over an activity that has |
| sense of isolation that is felt in the midst of the public | | | | played itself out, nor disappointed to be home early at |
| partying. | | | | day's end. In fact, you'll either be right on time or, |
| There is no quick fix - no simple cure. But, with some | | | | happily, find the fullness of your day has caused you to |
| realistic planning the pain associated with Thanksgiving, | | | | run a touch late. |
| and other holidays, can be minimized. Try these five | | | | 4. Simplify. The real purpose of simplification is to allow |
| ideas in your quest for a more peaceful Thanksgiving | | | | yourself to experience a day of freedom. Freedom, |
| this year: | | | | primarily, from guilt. Big, complicated plans often go |
| 1. Assess Options Early. The deadline is indeed deadly. | | | | awry and, especially at Thanksgiving, all things awry |
| While deadlines at times serve as positive | | | | are most unwelcome. By consciously deciding to keep |
| reinforcement in our lives, holiday deadlines are | | | | things simple you open up the realm of tripping over |
| absolutely brutal. The closer the time comes, the | | | | unexpected and delightful surprises. Did you plan to be |
| greater the pressure becomes to make a decision - | | | | in by six, Chinese takeout in hand? Imagine your delight |
| ANY decision. This is no time to dilly-dally. The posture | | | | when, at the Chinese restaurant, you run into an old |
| of the day here is to be proactive. This is especially | | | | friend who asks you to share a table. Remember - |
| important if, in fact, you may find yourself alone at | | | | simple sets the stage for surprising. |
| Thanksgiving. By resolving this issue early you allow | | | | 5. Reach Out. This is, perhaps, the hardest of the steps |
| yourself time to set positive, personal plans into action. | | | | to take. It's also, without a doubt, the most rewarding. |
| Do you like strolls in the park at dawn? Fabulous. Or, | | | | This step, however, should be taken only in the context |
| are you the sleep until noon and grab lunch at the | | | | of simplicity expressed in step number four. Don't |
| bistro type? Terrific. By planning early, you'll feel a | | | | agonize over inviting a family of twelve complete |
| positive sense of momentum as Thanksgiving | | | | strangers to dinner in your tiny apartment. Don't set the |
| approaches. | | | | alarm for 4am and then scour the city for homeless |
| 2. Mark The Calendar. This sounds quite simple, but is | | | | people to shelter and feed. (These are both good |
| actually very powerful. By marking your plans on the | | | | things - but, they are simply for another time) |
| "Official Keeper and Organizer of Life," you are saying | | | | Rather, consider the one neighbor, or store clerk, or |
| to yourself that you, indeed, have plans. Even if those | | | | garbage collector you can greet on Thanksgiving. Can't |
| plans include no one else, you do have plans. Go | | | | think of anyone? Then, go find someone. Look for |
| check your calendar - it's official. | | | | someone you recognize. Look for the sadness about |
| It may be, it is actually, a means of playing a trick on | | | | their eyes, the slowness in their step, the stoop of their |
| your mind, but the impact is quite concrete. Now, | | | | shoulders - the telltale signs that tell you they walk in |
| instead of fretting about what to do at Thanksgiving, | | | | the same shadow of loneliness that darkens your |
| you have the peace of knowing that all is in order. You | | | | holiday cheer. When you find them, greet them |
| can relax. This also gives you a wonderful degree of | | | | warmly. Two hearts will be warmed as a result of |
| freedom to simply consider other options. Now that | | | | your effort. |
| you have plans, the importance of your considerations | | | | ...There is no quick fix. Try these five steps to help take |
| is much less stressful - you can take it or leave it. If | | | | the pain out of Thanksgiving. You'll be glad you did. |